Hashtag: #RoundTableDiscussion

Yesterday evening I attended an event at Pisces Sushi Bar & Lounge — the event dubbed #RoundTableDiscussion is a dialogue series where you have some of Charlotte’s sharp, passionate and most stylish people — who come together and dialogue about topics ranging in the realm of relationships, love and dating in Charlotte (Which is an extremely hot topic here) and dating will always be a hot topic. This was a fun time, fun because the ambiance was chic, the people where good looking and stylish, wine was flowing, sushi was rampant (not for me I don’t like seafood) and you never know what you’re going to learn when you come to one of these events. I’ve been in Charlotte for a little over a year (from Milwaukee) and I knew immediately that this was a hot topic — as it is in many metro cities of thriving young single-blacks.

“…some of Charlotte’s sharp, passionate and most stylish people.”

The event was hosted by Shanard Smith @DaBestDressed. Him and his team put a lot of detailed effort into this event — from the hashtag name-tags to addressing each attendee by name — adding that personable touch. The attendee make-up entailed 40 some people — ages ranging from late 20’s to early to mid-30’s. The topic of last night’s event was the “Independent Woman” — this is almost always synonymous with black women (le sigh).

The conversation delved into discussions on the problems that successful women endure when making a substantial salary, ranging from not finding a man on her “level” (I loathe this term), to finding a man that is comparable to her salary grade, but he’s very much promiscuous and not really into her as much OR the man that is into her, worships her entire being, but he’s making substantially less. This topic has been discussed quite often and I can tell you the conversation went everywhere, it got professionally heated — I inserted a few stink faces…lol at some perspectives, but it was a galvanizing conversation for the passionate person — not an event for the meek.

…don’t give me the flowers and candy…get me some red bottoms.”

There comes a point where we have to say, so what’s the plan of action? Because this issue…yes this is an issue — that has been beaten up and I am TIRED of being the butt of the single black woman statistics jokes …well not me me, but you know what I mean. When I woman says “…don’t give me the flowers and candy…get me some red bottoms.” *insert stink face* Yes, this was an actual comment that I could not believe my ears. You don’t wonder why we’re stereotyped anymore, that’s why.

1) ..they are not red bottoms..they are Christian Louboutin’s!!!

2) …she has a right to have standards.

3) ..she’ll be single for a long while in Charlotte with that prerequisite

4) …she’s why I make the conscious decision to exert staying away from the numerous stereotype’s placed on us. ..I love sista’s who can just BE…BE different, and not “trying” to be and you feel that from her. (digressing)

I won’t turn this into a novelette — overall this was a fun professional chic event — filled with beauty, sass, loquacious statements, funny perspectives, stink face perspectives, that’s well worth attending. I am a genuine fan of people — who I perceive to be #goodpeoples success. I also love the exclusivity of the event, because it keeps it fresh, fun and conversational. – Sab


6 thoughts on “Hashtag: #RoundTableDiscussion

  1. I hate that I didn’t attend. I was told that it was only for 25 people max so I didnt bother. In regards to the “red bottom” comment, I am always surprised that women dont seem to know how many of them have such outrageous expectations and outlooks in terms of dating. Men tell women about these things all the time, but it remains some strange rumor very few of them wants to let sink in for some reason. I wish VH1 was only an exaggeration on TV, but sadly as a former resident of Atl, DC and now Charlotte I’ve found that those TV caricatures are far too real. I hope there are more events like this. There is a real divide in understanding.

    Thanks for the replay.

    • @ TV caricatures are far too real. 😦

      I naively believed it was just reality television producers making these characters up–literally making them into the caricatures that we see. Most of the the ladies there were far from those caricatures, but reality television is shaping some women’s aspirations of what is REALLY realistic. Shanard has another one coming up next week in Colombia. Thanks for the comment!


  2. First of all I would like thank Sabrina for covering the #RoundTableDiscussion. Great Job on Capturing the essence of this Monthly Event. A couple things that we talked about that were valid points and present reasons for further discussions around this topic were the CHANGING of Societal Gender Roles when entering into a relationship with a POWERFUL, EDUCATED, RESPECTED, & INDEPENDENT WOMAN!

    Do we allow SOCIETY to DICTATE our Relationships?
    Does AMBITION/DRIVE in a man equal the Success of the Woman he is Dating?
    Are MEN intimidated by the Successful Woman or do MEN Celebrate that Woman?

    Twitter: @DaBestDressed | Relationship Guru

  3. great post..great observations..great time..charlotte over the past decade(yes i am a NATIVE charlottean–“old charlotte” born & raised,we’re rare) has exploded w/different transplants from different cities all bringing different outlooks on life so to bring it all together at the #roundtablediscussion is always fun to see…

    i try to find the silver lining in everything so the one positive thing i can pull out of her comment is she knows what she wants & refuses to lower HER standards for anyone. the hazy part of it all,however,lies in whether there’s someone willing to GIVE her this on a consistent basis which worries me..i would hate for her to pass up the man made ESPECIALLY for her just because he would rather show his love by buying a bouquet of roses versus a shoebox of louboutins…

    LOVED this…thanks for coming out!!

  4. Sabrina I adore your description of the event and the comments that were expressed. Loving the stink face expression. I too had a very nice time at the Roundtable Discussion. I believe our community needs more positive, mature events where young African-American professionals are able to express their feelings openly. -@KDuB_EnT

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